What I Wish My Clients Knew: Insights from the Other Side of the Therapy Room.
As a therapist, I’ve spent countless hours sitting across from my clients, listening, guiding, and helping them navigate life’s challenges. But over the years, I’ve realized there are things I wish my clients knew—things that could make the therapy process more comfortable, open, and ultimately more helpful. Therapy is a partnership and understanding a few behind-the-scenes insights can help you feel more at ease and get the most out of your sessions.
Here’s a peek into the therapy room from my perspective and the lessons I’ve learned along the way.
1. I’m Not Here to Judge You—And I Never Will Be
One of the biggest barriers people face when starting therapy is the fear of being judged. The truth is, as a therapist, I’ve heard it all—and there’s nothing you could share that would make me think less of you. My role is to listen without judgment, offering support, understanding, and guidance as you work through your struggles. It’s my job to create a safe, non-judgmental space where you can be completely honest without fear of shame.
2. Vulnerability Isn’t Easy for Me, Either
Opening up in therapy can feel incredibly vulnerable. But it’s important to remember that, as a therapist, I’m human too. I understand how difficult it is to share your deepest thoughts and emotions. In fact, it’s often a struggle for me as well. Vulnerability is a process, and it takes time and courage. What’s important is that you take that first step and allow yourself to be seen in a way that feels comfortable for you.
3. You Don’t Need to Have It All Figured Out Before You Come In
It’s common for clients to feel like they need to have their thoughts completely organized or know exactly what’s wrong before they come to therapy. But that’s not how it works. The beauty of therapy is that it’s a space to explore, ask questions, and work through the things you may not even fully understand yet. You don’t need to have all the answers—my job is to help you discover them, and sometimes that starts with just showing up.
4. Therapy Is a Process, Not a Quick Fix
I know you’re looking for relief from your struggles, and I want that for you too. But it’s important to remember that therapy is a process, not an overnight solution. Healing, growth, and change take time. There may be setbacks, and you might not feel better immediately. Trust that each session is part of a bigger journey, and progress often happens in small, sometimes invisible ways.
5. Silence Is Okay—And It Can Be Powerful
Sometimes, there are moments in therapy when the room feels silent. You might feel the pressure to fill the space with words, but silence can be an incredibly powerful tool. Those quiet moments allow you to reflect, process, and connect with your thoughts. It’s okay to pause and take your time. I’m not rushing you to speak; I’m simply creating a space for you to gather your thoughts.
6. You’re the Expert on Your Life
While I may have knowledge, tools, and frameworks to offer, you are the expert on your own life. I can guide you, offer insights, and ask questions, but ultimately, you hold the answers. My goal is to help you tap into your own wisdom and strengths so that you can make the decisions that are right for you. Therapy is about empowerment and helping you uncover the resources you already have within.
7. Therapy Is a Two-Way Street
It’s easy to think of therapy as something where you simply talk and I listen, but the truth is, it’s a partnership. My role is to guide, support, and challenge you, but you also play a crucial part. The more open, honest, and willing you are to engage in the process, the more effective our work together will be. If something isn’t working for you or you feel a certain approach isn’t resonating, let me know. Communication is key to a successful therapeutic relationship.
8. There’s No “Right” Way to Do Therapy
Everyone experiences therapy differently, and there’s no “right” way to do it. Some people might feel comfortable diving into deep emotional work from day one, while others may prefer a more gradual approach. That’s perfectly okay! You can take therapy at your own pace. What’s important is that you feel safe, respected, and heard every step of the way.
9. Progress Isn’t Always Linear
There will be days when you feel like you’ve made huge strides, and others when you feel like you’re taking two steps back. That’s normal. Healing is a non-linear process, and there will be ups and downs. Be patient with yourself and trust the process. Even if it feels like you’re not making progress, you may be gaining important insights or developing tools that will help in the long term.
10. It’s Okay to Not Always Have a Clear Goal
While some people come into therapy with a specific goal in mind, others might not have a clear direction at first. That’s completely fine. Therapy can be a place to explore your feelings, understand your behavior, and work through challenges, even if you don’t know exactly what you’re aiming for yet. Sometimes, clarity emerges as you talk and reflect, and that’s a beautiful part of the process.
I hope these insights offer a bit of clarity and ease as you continue your therapeutic journey. As a therapist, I’m honored to walk alongside you as you navigate your challenges and grow. Remember, therapy is a safe space where you’re allowed to be imperfect, vulnerable, and real. Take it one step at a time, and know that I’m here to support you.
If you have any questions or thoughts about therapy, feel free to reach out—I’m always happy to help!
